Do you remember the last time someone posted or emailed you a group photo that you’re in? Did your eyes, like two heat-seeking missiles, immediately home in on your own face, checking yourself out to see if you looked presentable? Did you mentally Photoshop-out any unsightly blemishes and/or give yourself a virtual nose job?
Neither did I.
I did, however, just finish reading about myself in Donald Miller’s new book “A Million Miles In A Thousand Years.”
The experience is not easily described. I’ve had it happen a few times in the past, but they weren’t always very memorable books, so I’d tend to skip ahead to the parts I was in, smile or cringe at the passage in question, then stick the book on an upper shelf next to the other books-that-I-won’t-be-reading-but-can’t-sell-at-a-garage-sale-in-case-the-author-drops-by.
“A Million Miles…” is different. I’m not here to review it (yes, it’s superb, but you’ve probably heard that by now). I’m here to relate the exhilaration and terror of opening a book that a million people are going to read and seeing your name in print, over and over again.
Like most of you, I read “Blue Like Jazz” a few years ago. Unlike most of you, I then got to meet and hang out with characters from the book over the next three years. Like Penny. And Laura. And Rick the Pastor. In each case, Don had managed to describe a certain “essence” about them that struck me as absolutely true to the real person. I can’t tell you if every detail in “Blue Like Jazz” is exact. But I know that Penny is exactly the person you’d hope she’d be after reading about her.
And that’s what made my palms sweat as I opened to the first page of “A Million Miles…” As a recording artist, I’d spent years cultivating some sort of public image (it was, admittedly, a small-ish percentage of the public…), then trying, with varying degrees of success, to live up to it. Much of the cultivating was deliberate, some was probably subconscious, and all of it, as Christians should know, is ultimately futile. But Don and I, over the last few years, had spent weeks at a time working together and hanging out. He’d gotten to know me pretty well. And now, in the pages of his new book, Donald Miller was going to reveal my true, uncultivated, private essence. There was nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. And it was too late to call lawyers.
Some random impressions from my reading of “A Million Miles…”:
- I don’t recall ever getting up from my chair. (I have the bladder of a superhero.)
- I do recall laughing out loud. A lot.
- This time, unlike when I first read “Blue Like Jazz,” I knew almost all the characters. And I must say that Don’s portrayal of each seemed true to the person I knew.
- The book was strangely motivational. I’ve taken a few leaps of faith in my life, but reading “A Million Miles…” made me want to take more.
And what about me? How do I come off?
Well… Don’s a gracious guy, so who am I to argue with his flattering portrayal? I come off as quite a bit wiser than I am in real life. I stammer a lot less. He tends to focus on the good ideas I had for the screenplay and thankfully fails to mention the dumb ones. He perfectly portrays my long time friend and collaborator Ben Pearson, who is the glue that’s kept this entire movie enterprise from falling apart. And the details, as I recall them, are pretty accurate – on the first day we really did go kayaking through the snow-covered streets of his Portland neighborhood, etc.
But there is one detail pertaining to me that he got wrong. Maybe it was accidental. Or maybe he was afraid that the raw truth was too horrific for print. I guess I could ask him. But I’m thinking it might be more fun to turn this into a game…
If anyone out there can be the first to correctly identify and post the factual error pertaining to me in Donald Miller’s awesome new book, “A Million Miles In A Thousand Years,” I’ll send you a prize. (I’d send you the book, but I’m guessing that would be redundant.)
And here’s a hint: It occurs in the last few chapters. And it’s a one-word error.
oooooh I love a challenge!! And Now I know what to get my hubby for his birthday! THANKS!
page 228–”cross-eyed”
Loved the book as well. It is great to see 2 people I revere and respect working together and helping me make my faith more authentic and real!! Been a huge fan of yours since “Clone” and “Blue Like Jazz” was a beginning point in a major shift in how I view and act out my faith and belief in Jesus. Thanks to you both!!
Marketing ploy, eh!
Well, I’m buying the book anyways! I love Don’s writing …. and I have always been a “Steve” fan!
Let me guess: it somehow pertains to SWEAT (chapter 32)…
I think it has something to do with the choir. You weren’t in a choir?
Brian.
This is a total random guess. If I am way off then I apologize. Is it page 228 with the “sweat” landing on Janice’s shoulder? Perhaps it was “snot”??? I imagine snot would be a lot more embarrassing than sweat.
Don refers to you as a “she?”
I don’t have a factual error to report, but I do remember reading a typo. Instead of the word understood it read “inderstood.” I believe that was the only typo in the entire book. Although, just to prove it, I’m going to have to reread the entire thing again to find the exact page number. Typos aside, the book is great (for lack of a better, more concise, and more accurate description).
I’m guessing the sweat didn’t land on her shoulder in the choir?
or maybe it wasn’t sweat?
so not a typo? i did find one of those…
It is on page 246 and is the word “grateful”. Don asked you what you wanted of the viewer and his feelings after watching the film, and you said grateful.
Don says you stood completely still. Everybody who has seen you in concert knows you can’t stand completely still. Even with a broken ankle.
Did it have anything to do with the bear costume?
I do have a strong bladder as well, maybe I could pull it off and win this thing.
Was the sweat really snot because you had a runny nose and couldn’t wipe? That would suck and would be really fitting to pick up the ladies.
Are you going to tell when someone get’s it right, or keep us guessing!?
I’m thinking snot over sweat when you were in the choir.
I don’t know about a factual error, but I found a typo whilst reading. I don’t remember where it was located, but the word understood was spelt “inderstood.” Despite the error, the book was (for lack of a better, more accurate word) great.
“…one night Steve stood in the choir, directly behind Janice. Being a compulsive nose picker, a drop of BLOOD had gathered on the tip of his nose…” Not that I’m judging you (but you should seek treatment). Haha.
Steve,
Did you puke on Janice’s shoulder?
You may think it’s sweat… but it’s snot!
(I stole that little comedic gem from The Jungle Cruise at Disney)
‘Love you ….. Love your blogs, Steve!
Keep ‘em comin’!
on page 245, honestly is spelled honsetly.
does that count??
One of my fondest memories from Youth Ministry days-gone-by was getting pelted with water balloons during “I Blew Up the Clinic Real Good” at a Steve Taylor concert. Loved “Million Miles” and am hoping your project makes it to the screen. I would pay full-price…seriously.